On a recent errand-running trip through our neighborhood, I bumped into no fewer than five people I knew, in the span of stopping at four destinations. That’s one of the wonderful things about living in a walkable/bikeable community…except when you’re in a hurry, of course. I didn’t really spend much time speaking to the first few people I bumped into, and I probably did a decent job of communicating  that I was in a rush, as my niceties likely appeared somewhat artificial. However, after seeing the third or fourth person, I had to stop and ask myself: Why am I actually in such a hurry? I couldn’t even answer the question! I had completed most of the important tasks I had set out to achieve for the day, and had plenty of time before my next scheduled commitment.

What drives us to do this?

This likely varies somewhat for each of us, but one possibility is that acting is more comfortable than taking the time to define where it is we’re ultimately going. In some situations, acting can actually be a form of procrastination…But wait, how can that be? Isn’t action the solution to procrastination? Yes, but only if we have at least a reasonable idea of where we’re going. By keeping ourselves busy with the smaller things, either through constant physical action or even filling our minds with clutter, we may avoid the initial discomfort of dealing with some of life’s larger questions – questions whose answers may lead us toward significant change in our lives (e.g., in career, relationships, living environment, etc.). And when we’ve already developed long-standing habits of busying ourselves all the time, it takes a conscious effort to keep ourselves from snapping back into this mode, even after we have begun to tackle some of the larger questions.

This, of course, has a number of negative impacts. We stress ourselves out, and we may miss many opportunities to enjoy the present moment, and to connect and learn in a way that advances our growth. We may rarely be fully present and able to enjoy life. Additionally, we expend emotional and physical energy on thoughts and actions that aren’t necessarily moving us toward where we want to go – this is difficult when we’ve spent little time thinking about where we really want to go. Sometimes when we’re relaxing, and successfully clearing our minds of the smaller and less important things, these larger items have room in the playground of our minds. We may then gain input from other people and from our surroundings that is pertinent to these “big questions” – but only if we’re open to them. If we seek change in our lives, this is not only a good thing, but essential.

Following my own realization, I made a conscious effort to “slow the rush” when I had opportunities to relax. A week later, on our way to do some backwoods hiking and camping, we stopped at a river to enjoy some natural rock slides and miniature waterfalls, and to go for a swim. Although we had originally planned on arriving at our trailhead by a certain time, we ended up talking for well over an hour with an individual we had never met. We both learned an incredible amount from the conversation, covering everything from the river’s best attractions to eco-friendly housing, folk music, and even economics of pharmaceutical industries. And it inspired me to have a few additional realizations about my own life, and the value of pursuing what energizes us.

I obviously don’t always have this much time, as there are many situations where I actually do need to keep close track of time. However, it takes some effort to discern between times when it’s important to stick by the clock and times when it might be better to take my watch off and stick it in my pocket where I can’t see it!

So next time you’re in a hurry just to do something, anything, stop and ask yourself: Where am I in such a rush to go? And am I missing out on something even more important?

Dave Wheitner is a life coach based in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania who welcomes clients from around the world.